• TRAINER SKILLS

  • The work of a Trainer is different from the work of an Educator.

    Both are needed.

    An Educator teaches you what to think about in classes.

    A Trainer navigates you through transformational thoughtware-upgrade processes

    that change what you think-with during trainings.

     

    You may be serving as an Educator and would more appropriately serve as a Trainer.

    Or vice versa...

     

    Indeed, there are Trainers from each of the four Archetypal Lineages,

    yet anyone successfully delivering transformational thoughtware-upgrade Trainings

    will - consciously or unconsciously - apply a shared list of specific but unusual Trainer Skills.

     

    This platform intends to research, distinguish, and document these skills,

    and share them amongst the global Transformational Trainer community.

     

    Everything on this website is open-code thoughtware.

    It is copyleft so that it cannot be copyrighted.

    (Creative Commons BY SA 4.0 Int'l)

     

    WELCOME!

  • NOTE: This website is a Bubble in the Bubble Map of the massively-multiplayer online-and-offline thoughtware-upgrade personal-transformation game called StartOver.xyz. It is a doorway to experiments that upgrade your thoughtware so you can create more possibility. Your knowledge is what you think about. Your thoughtware is what you use to think with. When you change your thoughtware, you go through a liquid state as your mind reorganizes itself. Liquid states can bring up transformational feelings and emotions. By upgrading your thoughtware you build matrix to hold more consciousness. No one can do this for you. No one can stop you from doing it. Our theory is that when we collectively build one million more Matrix Points we will change the morphogenetic field of the human race for the better. Please choose responsibly to read this website. Reading this whole website is worth 1 Matrix Point. Doing any of the experiments earns you additional Matrix Points. Please use Matrix Code TRSKILLS.00 to log your Matrix Points earned at this website on login.startover.xyz. Thank you for playing full out!

  • Prerequisites

    These are not simply recommendations or good ideas.

    These are structural requirements.

    If these things are not already active parts of your life, worldview, and way, you will be like a donkey without hay.

    TRSKILLS.01: Carry Your Possibility Stone

    at all time

    Your Possibility Stone is your primary tool to shift into and hold the identity of 'Possibility Manager'.

     

    Your Possibility Stone is a pain-in-the-ass reminder that at any moment, no matter what is happening you have the choice to use your Box-survivalist-defense mechanisms or your Bright Principles for connecting through offer making.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.01:

    For a week, every time you are faced with a problem, physically hold your Possibility Stone between you and the problem. No matters whether the problem is a physical (you broken your friend screen phone), intellectual (you are having an argument), emotional (someone is having a low drama with you), energetic (someone keeps getting into your personal bubble of space), archetypal (you destroy every chance to travel to archetypal domains).

    Physically hold your Possibility Stone between you and the problem, and let it be a portal to give you 10 different ways you could shift out of it being a problem situation.

    TRSKILLS.02: Live With Your Beep! Book

    Your Beep! Book is your self-made Map of the path you've walked, the traps you've fell into, the cliff you've jumped, the detour you've taken to be exactly where you are right now.

     

    As Trainer, you are bridge builder. Your Beep! Book notes are the design of the bridge that you've built for yourself. A bridge that now could be used by a entire generation of edgeworkers to get to where you are. Never undermine the value of your notes!

     

    Treat your Beep! Book the way Christopher Columbus look upon his outline of the 'New Worlds' (they were new worlds for him and his fellow europeans): as world changing (thought)-maps!

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.02:

    Five days a week for an entire month, write 3 pages about your exploration at the edge of the outer borders of your known territory. This can range from short stories, thoughtmaps, drawings, insights, distinctions and its unfoldings, a process, to questions and its possible answers, ...

    TRSKILLS.03: Become An Experimenter

    How can you ask your clients to go to the edge of their Box if you are not willing to do the same? Your clients are inspired by what you do, not what you say.

     

    Adventuring yourself to the edge of your Box - for real, not in your mind - materialize as experiments. You cannot know what could happen at the edge of your Box, otherwise it wouldn't be an edge. The only way to discover how it could go is by experimenting.

     

    A big hint that you are Trainer, experimenting is one of the ecstasy of your life. If it is not yet, you can train yourself in experimental ecstasy. I promise its Fun!

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.03: Invent Your Own Experiments

    Experimenting for a Trainer is like using your Gremlin detector. It goes without questioning. The questioning comes from your Gremlin.

    Every day for the rest of your life, invent and do one experiment per day until it becomes a second nature.

    Experiment can vary in size, time, space, attention and resources. Experiments can go from eating your morning porridge with a fork, to knocking on your neighbors doors and collect one non-physical thing (like a belief, a story, a conclusions, etc...), to learn a poem by heart, to create a whole new gameworld, to drawing the flag of your nanonations, to appreciating the quality of your boss to them, to vacuuming your place in less than 5 min, to light a candle in your reading space, etc... There is a plethora of possible experiments at every time of the day. Commit to doing one a day.

    TRSKILLS.04: Thoroughly Do Weekly S.P.A.R.K. Experiments

    Thoroughly doing SPARK Experiments weekly is applying discipline to a commitment. How well are applying discipline to your commitments?

    TRSKILLS.05: Become Present

    Becoming Present is about becoming more of You right now, and now, and now.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.05:

    TRSKILLS.06: Enter A 3Cell For Making Evolutionary Pirate Agreements

    The purpose of your 3Cell is to encourage Authentic Evolution. As a Trainer, you cannot do it all by yourself. The lone-wolf strategy has maybe work until now but if you are reading this website, you you have found its limit.

     

    As a Trainer, probably more than you think, you need encouragement, you need a team that has your back, you need a team that will give your honest, clear, evolutionary feedback emerging from their commitment to your own evolution and not for their Gremlin.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.06: Create a 3Cell of Trainers - be them Possibility Management Trainer or from a different context (preferably a context where initiation and transformation is at the center). Make a WhatsApp (or Telegram, Signal, Facebook) group.

    Commit to them.

    Connect to them.

    Be clear with them.

    This might announce the start of your new gameworld!

    TRSKILLS.07: Take Back Your Attention

    Your attention is your most valuable resource. Without having your attention back, you cannot have access to your other resources.

     

    As a Trainer, you need to have taken back your attention from the dazzling storyworlds that modern culture is trying to sell you at the fastest rate possible.

    The storyworlds of being cool, skinny, young, rich, and beautiful.

    The storyworlds of resentment, low drama, being right, or making wrong.

    The storyworlds of 'I need money to live', ' I have to do something to have value for others', 'I can do it by myself'.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.07:

    1) For the first part of the experiment, get your Beep! Book and write a (long) list of the common things that unconsciously hijacked your attention. Find example of what capture your attention here: http://yourattention.mystrikingly.com/#common-things. Write in details, what, how often, how long, ...

    2) Circle 5 of those attention eating things that you would like to take your attention back from.

    3) For the next 5 weeks, take back your attention from those 5 things, one per week. During the first week, choose one of the 5 thing. Notice and catch yourself when you are giving your attention to it. When you catch yourself, pause. Really pause. Make a different decision. Put your attention on something else. For example, what you are trying to numb by letting your attention be hijacked.

    Split Your Attention

    Experiment TRSKILLS.08:

     

    Notice What You Notice

    Notice What You Notice With

    Notice What You Avoid Noticing

    Notice Who In You Is Doing The Noticing And Why

    Experiment TRSKILLS.09: pay attention to your attention.

    For 10 min, everyday for week, practice putting your attention on your attention (your awareness on what you are aware of). During those 20 minutes, pay attention where your attention wonders.

    Notice and write down - in details and concision - the sentences, the images, the needs, the stories, the voices where you attention wonders to without judgement about them. If criticisms do come up write them down without judgement about your judgement!

    Notice and write down next to each sentence which part of you is putting its attention on that particular story (Box, Being, Gremlin, Child/Parent/Demon Ego State, one of your 5 bodies, Bright Principles, Archetypal Lineages, your mother/father, etc...).

    Notice and write down what is the purpose that drives this part of you to drive your attention to that particular story.

     

    Notice how your attention wavers from one thought to the next.

    Notice what the survival patterns of your attention. Do not judged it, simply notice it.

    Your clients have the similar survival strategy as you. If you can't notice them in yourself, you won't be able to notice them in them either.

    Live In Neutral Self Observation

    Experiment TRSKILLS.10: Remind yourself to Observe Yourself

    Get yourself a reminder - a bracelet, an alarm, a pin, a notification on your computer, a post-it - that says 'Self-Observation'. Every time, you see it/hear it, position your observe outside of yourself. It feels like someone is looking over your shoulder. BEWARE: this observer is absolutely neutral. If you are judging yourself, you are not observing yourself.

    See how long you can keep doing what you were doing and observe yourself at the same time.

    Self-observation is a muscle like your attention or keeping your center. Muscle only get stronger if you train them. This experiment is about training you neutral self-observation muscle.

    Find Out Which Box Design You Use

    You have parts. Your parts want different things, sometimes those things contradict each other, enough to often drive you crazy.

     

    That's why it is quite useful to distinguish between your different parts and get a grip on what they like and don't like and what are they like - what is their design. One of those part is your Box. Your Box is different from your Gremlin. Your Gremlin is the active part of you that will protect the Box at any cost. The Gremlin is active, the Box is passive. The Box is dead machine covered with reactionary buttons that when pushed reflexively behaves. Your Gremlin at that moment would then in addition attack the person who pushed the button.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.11: Make a list of 50 characteristics of your Box.

    1) Go to the 18 Boxes bubble and find out which of the 18 Boxes your Box is designed on. Your Box can be a clear design on one Box or can have been inspired by different ones.

    2) Make a list of 50 characteristics of your Box design right now (your Box has probably already changed while doing evolutionary work). Your Box characteristics are not bad or good. Being aware of them gives your choice about them.

    Become An Expert In Box Mechanics

     

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.12:

    Distinguish Your Box And Your Being

     

     

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.13:

    Understand Memetics

    The ideas you think with are called memes.

     

    Memes are like genes.

    In the same way that genes are the smallest instructions for the design of your physical body...

    memes are the smallest instructions for the design of your intellectual body... your mind.

     

    Your memes are what you think with. When you think about what you think with you get a chance to start over.

     

    Memetics is the study, detection, creation, transformation and use of memes.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.14:

    Read all the scripts from memetics engineering sessions in the Memetics Bubble. Then ask another fellow trainer to have a session with you where you both will look at each other's memes using the principles of Memetics Engineering.

    The point here is not to change the memes that you are using. The point of this experiment is to develop the skill to look closer and closer at the meme at work in your Box and in their Box.

    You might, at some point, almost feel the memes engage and trigger a whole bunch of other memes. Quite thrilling!

    Bypass Your Mind Machines

    Experiment TRSKILLS.15:

    When we - the General Memetics Team - write up the process of bypassing Your Mind Machines, just do it. Find another fellow trainer who is willing to hold space for you while you go through this process. Or even better that is willing to also go through the process and do it on each other. Simple. Clear. Efficient. Your life will be different after that!

    Disidentify From Your Survival Strategy (Box)

    After you distinguish between your Box and your Being, the next step is to free your identity from your survival strategy - your Box.

     

    Up to 18 years old, out of survival imperative, we identity ourselves with our Box. If we didn't do that, we would be too dangerous for our environment - and maybe for ourselves - that we would die. At 18 years, you should have had this choice. Most of us have not.

     

    It doesn't matter, you get the choice now. The choice to have your identity be independent from your survival strategy. Great, how? By making a gap between 'you' and your survival strategy.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.16: Make a gap between 'you' and your survival strategy

    The gap can be as thin as sheet of paper, just enough for your two parts to be independent from each other. After making your list of 50 Box survival characteristics, every time you notice one of the behaviors coming up. Pause. Don't try to make it go away. This is probably another one of your Box strategy : to not look at your Box strategy.

     

    Find Out Which Dominant Brain You Have

    All of us has four brains. However, for most of us, they are not balanced. You have one brain that is dominant. Your dominant brain determines what it important, how to connect, how to relate, what are the different steps for a project, what is at the center of the projects, what are the values, ... It's a filter through which to look at the world.

     

    It could be that you are at war with one or your teammate because you don't know which dominant brain you have and which dominant they have. It is so simply revolutionary to carry this distinction. It save my life more than once!

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.17:

    To discover which dominant brain you are, pick one object next to you, any object and look at it. Pay attention to what are your first impulses (not more than 3 impulses!) towards it. What comes to you first in relation to that object?

     

    I just did the experiment with someone. I threw him a pen and asked him: 'What are you first impulses towards the pen?'

    He say: 'Teal'. I said: 'What?'. He: 'The color teal.' Me: 'Ah. Thank you.'

    He say: 'I now want to put it back in the plastic bag where it belongs.'

    I say: 'Thank you.' and ask him: 'What brains do you think you have?'

    He say: 'Blue and yellow.'

    I say: 'Yes. You telling me the color of the pen is your Blue Brain at work, and then wanting to put it back when it belongs, is your Yellow Brain at work.'

    Exit The World Of Right/Wrong and Good/Bad

    The dichotomy Right/Wrong, Good/Bad installed in us from a too young age feeds from the Shadow World. If I'm right, then you are wrong. If this is good, then one day I could do something bad. On and on... It's terrifyingly so embedded in our language that most of us use it without even noticing it.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.18: Delete 'Right', 'Wrong', 'Good', 'Bad' from your vocabulary.

    It takes unbroken attention to your speech to not pronounce those words. When you catch yourself saying it, you are sleeping. Stay awake. Keep your attention for as long as it takes. You will start to feel the pain of hearing that word in your and other's mouths.

     

    Extra: you can do this also with words such as 'like', 'so', 'hum' or using 'you' instead of 'I'.

    Own Your Problems

     

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.19:

    Consciously Use Your 3 Powers

    Experiment TRSKILLS.20: Consciously Use Your Power of Asking by asking the next question.

    Asking the next question in the space can take it either deeper, up or sideways into another space. Questions can be the steering wheel of the space deciding where are we going next.

    • To bring a space deeper, question the assumptions the space is made of that the people in the space are maintaining. Look in the dark places.
    • To bring a space up, question the Bright Principles, the purpose of the space (you would first have to find you is the spaceholder... it is not always the one that declare itself so. Keep your senses out!), or question who is awake and who is not.
    • To bring the space sideways, ask a question for which the answer lays in a different space. Ask the question while being connected with people and take them with you onto the next adventure.

    Practice those three types of questions. You don't ever have to be a victim of the quality of the space anymore.

     

    Also practice noticing the next question the space needs - even you are not the one who says it. Notice where the space goes with every question.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.21: Consciously Use Your Power of Choosing

    The power of choosing for a Trainer is imminent. When faced with a client, there's often so many doors to open, so many golden keys. How to choose? Which one to choose? If you can't choose, you cannot support your client. They are paying you because they can't choose themselves.

     

    By choosing one option, you have to grieve the lost of the opportunity to choose the other options. It is huge. You are in luck that you've learn how to feel and how to feel sad.

     

    First, practice choosing with more anger than usual. This or that. Pasta or salad? Movie or book? Which movie? A phone or video call? Dress or pants? Walk or bike ride? This time or that time? You are face with choice all day long. Every time you are faced with a choice, raise your anger to 18% and make the choice and commit to it. For a while at least.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.22: Consciously Use Your Power of Declaring

    Practice consciously using your power of declaration by declaring to your circle what you are. 'I am a memetic engineer.' 'I am a mid-wife of edgeworkers.' 'I am a witch.' 'I am psychic.' 'I am a gameworld alchemist.'

    Then you have to prove it.

    Use your power of declaration to put yourself in a place where your Bright Principles, your Archetypal Lineage, and your Being have necessity to come through no matter what. No matter how your Box and Gremlin are trying to sabotage you.

    Take a risk! What could happen? Maybe that it works...

    Become Radically Responsibility for Time

    Experiment TRSKILLS.23: Carry a watch. Buy a watch and wear it. How can you be responsible for time if you don't know what time it is? Your phone is not your watch, it contains too many distraction and brings in the gameworld of technology into your space. Asking someone else for time is giving your responsibility away. Buy a damn watch!

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.24: Be a Time Maker.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.25: Moving Faster Than the Speed of Time or 'Whizzbang'.

    Next time you clean your bathroom, get an timer set for 8 min. Press start and GO! The only way you can do this is to turn your mind off and to just move faster than the speed of thinking. Do the next task, and the next task all under 8 min. It's ecstatic I promise!

    If you want to spend more than 8 min cleaning your bathroom, and have no time to make your website, experiment, read your book, etc... then something else is really going on.

    Minimize Your NOW

     

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.26:

    Explore The Entire Distinctionary

     

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.27:

    Hunt Treasure In StartOver.xyz

     

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.28:

    Distinguish Your 5 Bodies

     

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.29:

    Live On The New Map Of Feelings & Phase 2 of Feelings Work

    As a Trainer it is so crucial that you live on the New Map of Feelings and that you are USING your feelings for your everyday life, not simply talking about them. Talking about your feelings is Phase 1 of feelings work.

     

    When you move to Phase 2 of feelings work, you don't lose Phase 1. Meaning something it is useful and necessary to talk about your feelings while you are feeling them. Sometimes...

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.30:

    Exit Verbal Reality and Enter Experiential Reality

     

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.31:

    Lower Your Numbness Bar

     

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.32:

    Recognize The Five Phases Of Change

     

     

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.29:

    Take Back Your Voice

    Do The 3-3-3 Exercise: Rage Work

    3 Minutes 3 Times Per Week For 3 Months

    Establish Your Ability To Say, "STOP!" and "NO!"

    Take Back Your Authority

    Build Your Ability To Commit

    Make And Keep Commitments

    Activate Your Dragon - Give Her A Voice

    Own Your Gremlin

    Feed Your Gremlin Something Besides Low Drama

    Open Your Pearl

    Distill Your Bright Principles

    Do At Least 10 Possibility Labs With Different Trainers

    Stellate Your Four Feelings Archetypes

    Your 4 feelings are your rocket fuel and one of the most extraordinary resources for fulfilling your destiny. They are one of the foundational resources for your other resources.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.xx:

    Heal Your Reactivity: Buttons, Hooks, Triggers, Traumas, Voices, and Imbalances

    Become A Trigger Hunter

    Take Your Balls Back From Your Mother (or) Your Center Back From Your Father

    Heal Your Brain Splits

    Quit School... Finally Get Out

    Make Your Story-Making A Conscious Choice

    Become Radically Responsible For Being You

    Escape Your 6 Prisons

    Find The Category Of Your Archetypal Lineage

    Send A Signal That You Are Preparing Yourself To Jack-In To Your Archetypal Lineage By Wearing Your Archetypal Lineage Talisman

    Make Your Website

    Experiment TRSKILLS.xx: JUST. DO. IT.

     

    How do you think people are going to find you if you don't put yourself out there?

    Navigate Your Own Possibility Team

    Two reasons:

    One, creating, maintaining, and replacing yourself as the main spaceholder in your own Possibility Team builds huge amount of matrix. Matrix to hold space, matrix to take feedback, matrix to invent, matrix to be responsible, matrix to go non linear, matrix to connect and keep connection, matrix to be the person who would navigate a Possibility for a year, two years, ....

     

    Second, this is how you start building your real circle, the circle of people that your qualities of Being, your Bright Principles and your Archetypal Lineage are feeding. Building your circle happens one person at a time, one legend at a time, one Team/ Work-Talk / Workshop at a time. Those are the people who will come to your Expand The Box.

     

    Experiment TRSKILLS.xx:

    Commit. Simply commit to start a Possibility Team in your living room - Online or Physical. If your commitment is authentic, it will start. Commit to be there each week, same time, same place - Thursday night 19.30 at this address or at this Zoom link.

    Take Steps On Your Trainer Path

    Gain An Accurate Assessment Of Current Reality

    Escape The Patriarchy

    Shift Your Point Of Origin Into Archearchy

    Practice Taking A Resilient Stand

    Stand In Adulthood As Your Home

    Give Worktalks Regularly

    Deliver Workshops Regularly

    Commit To Radical Responsibility

    Start Exploring All Three Worlds

  • Foundational Skills

    Become Centered

    Become Grounded

    Become Bubbled

    First Position: Centered, Grounded, Bubbled

    13 Tools

    Energetic Sword of Clarity

    Scanning 5 Bodies

    Unmix Your Emotions

    Become Unhookable

    Decontaminate Your Adult Ego State

    Owning Your Gremlin Phase 1

    Shift Your Identity

    7 Core Skills

    Owning Your Gremlin - Phase 2

    Fair / Unfair Conversations

    Being The Janitor

    Radically responsible reality - the One Law - is that whatever is not handled in the Training Space to create the sanctuary aerodrome of the Training Space is your job. When you are serving the Space, then by handling the jobs you notice that need doing, you are doing what the Space needs. Every mess is your mess. You are the Janitor of the Space.

    Being A Trainer

    Conscious Theater

    Meta Conversation

    Become Money

    Heal Your Technopenuriaphobia

    Use The Trainer Alphabet

    Aliveness Through Ongoing Improvisation

  • Space Creation and Navigation Skills

    Set Context

    You have so many options to choose from:

    • You can Set the Context of a Space before you create the Space.
    • You can create the Space before you Set the Context of the Space.
    • You can Set the Context of a Space as a way of Creating the Space.

    Your choice often depends on what dynamics and forces are already alive in a physical space or in individuals in the people you detect from your 5-Body Scanning.

    Eight Points

    Call In Bright Principles

    Hold Space

    Navigate Space

    Conscious Use of Your Gremlin

    Greeting the Presiding Deity of the Space

    Go Nonlinear

    Make And Use Side Doors

    Put your shoulder against the wall.

    Make sure you are in contact with everyone in the Space.

    Lean through.

    Put your Grounding Cord and Point Of Origin into the new Space.

    Finding Making and Using Doorways

  • Liquification Skills

    Pulling The Rug Out

    As-Ising

    Is-Glue Dissolver

  • Transformational Process Skills

    Memetic Engineering

    2 Feedbacks: Rapid Learning and Vacuum

    Frying Pan

    Wok

    Poop On The Table (Memetic Engineering)

    Coaching for Presence in Reality.

    Mind Machines

    Journey Into The Earth

    Phoenix Process

    Torus Technology

    Purple Card

    Resistance Decision Making

    Become Skilled in Do-Overs

    Become Skilled in Do-Overs

  • Relating Skills

    5 Listenings

    5 LISTENINGS 1. Normal Neurotic, 2. Adult / Active, 3. Possibility Listening, 4. Discovery Listening, 5. Listening to the Universe

    7 Speakings

    7 SPEAKINGS 1. Normal Neurotic, 2. Discussion (either Neurotic or Adult), 3. Adult Listening, 4. Possibility Listening, 5. Discovery Speaking, 6. Dragon Speaking, 7. Speaking from the Void.

    Relationship as a Space of Possibility

    Relationship as a Gremlin Free Space

    Archetypal Feminine and Masculine

    Entering Archetypal Ego State Through the Adult Ego State

    Archeamory

    Being With

    Negotiate Intimacy

    Gain Intimacy Journeyer Skills

    Activate Your Inner Resources For Connection

    Become Aware Of The 5 Controls

    Recover Intimacy

    Source Archetypal Love

    Make Completion Loops Rather Than Roadblocks

    Source Archetypal Love

    Experience Countenance

    Woman Making

    Man Making

    Navigate Three Domains Of Love

  • Legend Making Skills

    Through Your Clients

    It is not so much about event and actions in the world. It is about who your Clients become through your work that others experience them differently in a positive and attractive way.

    Legend Making Results